The street: Pachamama. The city: Cochabamba, Bolivia. The tour guide: Timothy. Enjoy!

Click here to view the embedded video.

You know the comparison lists people make of pros and cons? Usually we weigh one against the other to help make a decision. Every so often I am sizing up the upbringing of our children looking at the pros and cons. At this moment one of the pros in their extraordinary lives I can see is their colorful friendships. The following pics were taken at the field day on the step bleachers at our school. How beautiful the mix of skin, heritages and languages; just to name a few of the differences giving my kids a step up in life.

My oldest boy had his golden birthday on Monday… 11 on the 11th! (Click images to see them larger.)

When my youngest boy, Tyler, was an infant we used taxis to get around. Some taxi drivers are chatty. One afternoon I ducked into the cab of one such chatty driver with my baby boy on my lap. The man began with the usual questions of where I am from, how long we have been here, etc. Then he asked about my boy. Is he your son? Yes. Was he born here? Yes. Then the oddest thing happened. The opinion expressed with beaming pride had me scraping my jaw off the floor mat of the back seat of his car.

“Ah! So he is Bolivian! How good that he is improving the Bolivian race!” he nodded his head and looked once more at the light skin of my son through the crooked rear-view mirror. Personally I find that saddening.

In related news some years back Miss Bolivia commented, “It is wrong to assume that all Bolivians are short, poor Indians. In the tropical region I am from we are all tall, white and speak English.” She was ridiculed in the press and many shameful articles were published denouncing the racism that runs rampant in Bolivia. It never ceases to amaze me that in a nation with the land mass the size of Texas and the population comparable to that of New York City there is so much hatred between people groups. The Cambas have words to say about the Collas. Those of the Altiplano criticize those living in the Amazonian region. The light the dark. The European and the Native. Those who purely speak Castellano and those who speak a more ancient tongue. Not to mention the five major political parties ranging from Socialist to Autonomous. The divides run deep and dark, as I am sure they do in most lands.

I digress.

Recently the issue of race was raised on my cousin Lynde’s blog: A Wordy Girl Mom ‘The R Word”. She and her husband are as caucasian as they come. Last year they were blessed to bring home a beautiful, vibrant daughter from Haiti. Their daughter is in Kindergarten this year. Amongst the multitude of adjustments to be made there have been some discussions that have arisen about race. Lynde addressed a few ways that they are teaching their girl about race. I thought this would be a wonderful opportunity to talk about race in our family.

Here is one of the comments I left over there on her blog that got me to thinking about doing a dedicated post:

… I wonder why race is such a huge issue in the States, the supposed Melting Pot. Ever since my kids could be aware of stuff like that we have lived in Bolivia. This morning after reading your post I thought to myself, “Oh, I have never even fielded this race business with my kids. I wonder if they have been hurt or something by someone.” So I went immediately one by one and asked them if anyone had ever brought up the fact that they are a different color from their papa, that their mama and papa are different colors, etc. Nope. Not one. Raimy is 12, and the most sensitive, yet no one had ever brought that up with her. Maybe we are just generally “odd” in Bolivian eyes and so the race stuff gets lumped in with all the other stuff that sets us apart. I am very curious if when we come to the States [for a visit] in January if the race stuff will come up.

During the beautiful stages of coloring books and learning our colors when my three big ones were little I threw a question out there just to see how they would respond.

“What color are you?”

They looked at their arms for a while and then to each other. The corporate answer was finally, “We are skin color.” I told them that was great. Then I took it one step further, “What color is your papa?” They decided that he, too, was skin color just a little more brown than they are. “And me, what color am I?” They tell me I am skin color too, of course, but with a little more pink in it.

Since then we have had other talks not so much about race but about ethnicity. To fill you in, in case you did not know, my husband, DaRonn is African American. I am as white as all get out. Living in Bolivia has opened their eyes to the beautiful spectrum of humanity. To allow them to identify with their roots we let them play with some titles. Here is the way that they describe each member of our family.

Papa – African American

Mama – Caucasian American

Raimy, Timothy and Gabrielle – African Caucasian American

Tyler – African Caucasian Bolivian American

Kaitlynn – Bolivian American

I truly hope that this list does not offend anyone. We celebrate our African American roots. We enjoy the Caucasian influence in our lives. We revel in the tri-racial aspect that the Bolivian boy and girl bring to us. Then through it all we live in a hammock sway between the Northern hemisphere and the Southern hemisphere, knowing the rhythms, tastes, weather and speech of more than one place.

In the middle of it all I know in my heart that the culture rich existence we provide them will be to their benefit. Then the temporal worry wart whispers once in a while in me wondering if I am inflicting irreparable damage. Inevitably within minutes there come a reminder that it is ok in a hug around my neck, a Spanglish make-believe wafting to my ear, the feel of the brush in my hand as I style and shape hairs, or in the look in their eyes when they call me mama.

I think often about their futures. I wonder who they will choose to fill their hearts with. I imagine that the multi-cultural kaleidoscope will be one of my greatest treasures when I am old and wrinkly.

P.S. I didn’t plan on writing a 1,000 word post on this topic. Must’ve been important to me.

EDIT: Since this is my 700th post I am going to take the liberty to add some irresistable charts. You know how I love my charts!

Racial Ethnicity Demographic comparisons in the U.S. 2008

Racial Ethnicity Demographic comparisons in Bolivia 2002

(The origami jungle animals were a gift from my son.)

I imagine that the family and close friends will be the only ones that will want to invest the two minutes to watch some everyday antics at the Washington house. That is cool with me. The camera was just there on my desk as I worked so I pushed play without them knowing. Here they are in all their hilarity.

Yep, she’s fitting right in. My kids are wondrous!

See related vlog post:

Vlog Two Minutes with my Two Year Old Tyler

Raimy and Timothy, 3 & 2, 2001

Timothy and Gabrielle, 3 & 2, 2003

Tyler and Kaitlynn, 3 & 2, 2010

Three and two, third time ’round

Sibling cuddles

Tongue twister interpretations

Applause for bathroom business

Bi-lingual make-believe

Messes and lullabies

Picture book awe

Coffee shots for mama

Scrambles for papa’s lap

Tickle spots

Q and A all day

Lub-oo and I love you too

Sticky kisses

Hugs forever

Change is a familiar friend. The change I am feeling right now could be compared to what a driver feels as they change lanes on a busy highway trying to make their way to the exit ramp. My head is turning back and forth, I am checking my surroundings, stuff is happening all around at dangerous speeds, the anxiety is up a tad because I fear I am going to miss something important… yet all the while I have my goal in mind and the actions I am taking are leading me to that end. When I am finally on that blessed ramp I can slow down and merge with the calmer side road. It will be nice to be able to take in the scenery and have a nice chat with those in the car. Until then I am on full alert, full speed ahead.

One thing I am sure of is the fact that I will be different when this adoption is finally finalized. There is a welcome change taking place in so many facets of my being. I can’t define it right now (I’m driving, for goodness sake, gotta keep my eyes on the road, ya’ know, can’t get distracted right now). All I know is that I will like it very much.

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Things are going very well with the bonding, the visiting, the process, and all that.

On the technical side of things we turned in the form yesterday requesting a second court appearance to be granted permission of “convivencia” (that she gets to live with us!). This form could only be submitted after the reports from the social worker and psychologist were completed and turned in. Thanks to the top notch team at the orphanage this was done quickly and efficiently. Until this second appearance is given we continue to visit daily, usually twice a day. Yesterday I think we finally found the quickest route that gets us there is under 15 minutes, rather than the 20+ it was taking going as the crow flies.

On the bonding front (by the way, I dislike greatly the word ‘bonding’. It sounds so gluey) all is well. She really loves her papa. She and I are finding ways to enjoy being together. With Raimy she is tight. Raimy is helping her connect with Gabrielle. Timothy and her have their moments of pure sweetness and then they are off playing again. Tyler and her have shown no particular feelings one way or the other. They give hugs when it is time to say good-bye; I think their connection will take place more when we finally have her in our house.

On all other fronts not related to the adoption we are a bit stretched. I prefer not to go into that right now because I feel like I am going to break under the taunting voice of perfectionism if I begin to pick it all apart. Compartmentalizing, prioritizing, making quick decisions and sticking with them, selective ignorance and adjusted expectations have been the way to just push through.

On the emotional front we are keeping it together. We acquired permission from the home to bring her to church with us along with a Tia (caregiver) from the home. Tia Lucy came and helped be a reference point of familiarity for her since we had only just started to get to know her on Thursday. It went so much better than I could have ever hoped. Turns out she likes being the center of attention in a large group of people (gets that from me! ha!). The people at church were so kind and happy with us. I tried not to cry so as to not concern Kaitlynn. She is so well behaved and just sat on my lap playing quietly as Papa preached.

On the practical front we have had some fun happenings.

• I now know her shoe size.
• I got to give her a bath.
• As long as I have a bottle of water to share we are best buds.
• I got to do her hair for the first time.
• She showed me the clothes she wanted to wear and I helped her dress.
• We got a half-way decent family picture thanks to a park bench, a rock, luck and the timer feature on our fancy camera.

Without further ado, a few pics from our last couple of days.

Papa and Gabrielle having some fun in the park

I love this picture of us all together

Kaitlynn loving on Raimy

Just us Girls

What two year old doesn't love this game? "Again, again, again..."

The adoration is mutual with Timothy and Kaitlynn

Mama and Kaitlynn

Even the sky agreed it was a happy day that evening as we said our farewells

It is a good tired though. Not wanting to miss a moment, attentive to the needs of our new one, attentive to the needs of the older kids, juggling ministry responsibilities, and trying to not forget to eat makes for some well earned exhaustion. Let’s see if I can make my brain squeeze out some memorable stuff.

Tyler insists on calling his new sister Micheal.

Raimy made some strong ties with her sister at the park.

Gabrielle told me she had some of the same anxieties I did about if her new sister would like her or not.

Timothy stepped in and took some initiative in being helpful with Tyler.

Kaitlynn likes: potato chips, cell phones, swings, animal names and sounds – especially cows, hugs, drinking water from a 2L bottle, sorting shapes, stacking blocks and knocking them down, brushing hair, and electronic toys that play songs.

We are coming along on the names. She has Papa down pat; even goes looking for him calling out Papa. So sweet!

Tomorrow, if everything goes according to plan, we will pick up a worker and Kaitlynn to bring them to church with us. Should be a good time!

First of all I want to say that I am so very touched by all the people leaving comments here at The @, on Facebook, Twitter and in personal emails. We feel all the support and prayers. Thank you!

Today was amazing! I was so proud of all my children as they played together so nicely. Worries about jealousy? None. They were really so great! The newest little Washington was a bit overwhelmed at first both in the morning and after her nap; then there was this moment when she just clicked over. We all saw it. She started smiling, talking and even laughing.

I think my favorite part of the day was when we were getting ready to go and she went around the room pointing at all of us saying: Papa, Mama, Hermana, Hermana, Hermano, Hermano. Then she gave us all big hugs one at a time. So great!

Can you believe it?!

Wowzers! Smiles all around!

She wanted water from the big 2L like everyone else. (Yes, we are already sharing germs. ha!) So I helped her and it spilled down her front. I expected a cry. Instead I got to hear her laugh for the first time. It became a game. I think she drank a whole liter of water. The whole front of her jacket was soaked! Then there was the cap game... everyone was laughing. It was great!

We took about a hundred pics today plus a couple short videos. It is nigh unto midnight so I am going to upload just a few more shots from our time together and call it a day.

We were still warming up to each other here.

Firsts today:

• Hearing her say to me, “Te quiero, mamá.” (I love you, mama.)
• Hearing her laugh.
• Seeing all the siblings having fun together.