I imagine that the family and close friends will be the only ones that will want to invest the two minutes to watch some everyday antics at the Washington house. That is cool with me. The camera was just there on my desk as I worked so I pushed play without them knowing. Here they are in all their hilarity.

Yep, she’s fitting right in. My kids are wondrous!

See related vlog post:

Vlog Two Minutes with my Two Year Old Tyler

“Gabrielle Moriah likes Papaya”

This little rhyme has been true since the girl ate her first bite of solid food. It was when we were living in Santa Cruz that she got her first tastes even before she cut a tooth or could walk. My baby ate papaya like it was going out of style.

Now that she is eight she still enjoys papaya along with her two sisters. I eat it every once in a while. My boys won’t touch the stuff. Personally, I think it smells like feet. Not the pretty manicured feet. Nope. The stinky, sticky, hours-in-the-gym, hold-your-nose-I’m-coming-through feet.

The papaya tree is lanky and tall with very few leaves. To see the bulging fruit swaying at the top of the trunk you think that it will double over. Papaya: tropical and comical.

Raimy and Timothy, 3 & 2, 2001

Timothy and Gabrielle, 3 & 2, 2003

Tyler and Kaitlynn, 3 & 2, 2010

Three and two, third time ’round

Sibling cuddles

Tongue twister interpretations

Applause for bathroom business

Bi-lingual make-believe

Messes and lullabies

Picture book awe

Coffee shots for mama

Scrambles for papa’s lap

Tickle spots

Q and A all day

Lub-oo and I love you too

Sticky kisses

Hugs forever

Change is a familiar friend. The change I am feeling right now could be compared to what a driver feels as they change lanes on a busy highway trying to make their way to the exit ramp. My head is turning back and forth, I am checking my surroundings, stuff is happening all around at dangerous speeds, the anxiety is up a tad because I fear I am going to miss something important… yet all the while I have my goal in mind and the actions I am taking are leading me to that end. When I am finally on that blessed ramp I can slow down and merge with the calmer side road. It will be nice to be able to take in the scenery and have a nice chat with those in the car. Until then I am on full alert, full speed ahead.

One thing I am sure of is the fact that I will be different when this adoption is finally finalized. There is a welcome change taking place in so many facets of my being. I can’t define it right now (I’m driving, for goodness sake, gotta keep my eyes on the road, ya’ know, can’t get distracted right now). All I know is that I will like it very much.

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Things are going very well with the bonding, the visiting, the process, and all that.

On the technical side of things we turned in the form yesterday requesting a second court appearance to be granted permission of “convivencia” (that she gets to live with us!). This form could only be submitted after the reports from the social worker and psychologist were completed and turned in. Thanks to the top notch team at the orphanage this was done quickly and efficiently. Until this second appearance is given we continue to visit daily, usually twice a day. Yesterday I think we finally found the quickest route that gets us there is under 15 minutes, rather than the 20+ it was taking going as the crow flies.

On the bonding front (by the way, I dislike greatly the word ‘bonding’. It sounds so gluey) all is well. She really loves her papa. She and I are finding ways to enjoy being together. With Raimy she is tight. Raimy is helping her connect with Gabrielle. Timothy and her have their moments of pure sweetness and then they are off playing again. Tyler and her have shown no particular feelings one way or the other. They give hugs when it is time to say good-bye; I think their connection will take place more when we finally have her in our house.

On all other fronts not related to the adoption we are a bit stretched. I prefer not to go into that right now because I feel like I am going to break under the taunting voice of perfectionism if I begin to pick it all apart. Compartmentalizing, prioritizing, making quick decisions and sticking with them, selective ignorance and adjusted expectations have been the way to just push through.

On the emotional front we are keeping it together. We acquired permission from the home to bring her to church with us along with a Tia (caregiver) from the home. Tia Lucy came and helped be a reference point of familiarity for her since we had only just started to get to know her on Thursday. It went so much better than I could have ever hoped. Turns out she likes being the center of attention in a large group of people (gets that from me! ha!). The people at church were so kind and happy with us. I tried not to cry so as to not concern Kaitlynn. She is so well behaved and just sat on my lap playing quietly as Papa preached.

On the practical front we have had some fun happenings.

• I now know her shoe size.
• I got to give her a bath.
• As long as I have a bottle of water to share we are best buds.
• I got to do her hair for the first time.
• She showed me the clothes she wanted to wear and I helped her dress.
• We got a half-way decent family picture thanks to a park bench, a rock, luck and the timer feature on our fancy camera.

Without further ado, a few pics from our last couple of days.

Papa and Gabrielle having some fun in the park

I love this picture of us all together

Kaitlynn loving on Raimy

Just us Girls

What two year old doesn't love this game? "Again, again, again..."

The adoration is mutual with Timothy and Kaitlynn

Mama and Kaitlynn

Even the sky agreed it was a happy day that evening as we said our farewells

It is a good tired though. Not wanting to miss a moment, attentive to the needs of our new one, attentive to the needs of the older kids, juggling ministry responsibilities, and trying to not forget to eat makes for some well earned exhaustion. Let’s see if I can make my brain squeeze out some memorable stuff.

Tyler insists on calling his new sister Micheal.

Raimy made some strong ties with her sister at the park.

Gabrielle told me she had some of the same anxieties I did about if her new sister would like her or not.

Timothy stepped in and took some initiative in being helpful with Tyler.

Kaitlynn likes: potato chips, cell phones, swings, animal names and sounds – especially cows, hugs, drinking water from a 2L bottle, sorting shapes, stacking blocks and knocking them down, brushing hair, and electronic toys that play songs.

We are coming along on the names. She has Papa down pat; even goes looking for him calling out Papa. So sweet!

Tomorrow, if everything goes according to plan, we will pick up a worker and Kaitlynn to bring them to church with us. Should be a good time!

First of all I want to say that I am so very touched by all the people leaving comments here at The @, on Facebook, Twitter and in personal emails. We feel all the support and prayers. Thank you!

Today was amazing! I was so proud of all my children as they played together so nicely. Worries about jealousy? None. They were really so great! The newest little Washington was a bit overwhelmed at first both in the morning and after her nap; then there was this moment when she just clicked over. We all saw it. She started smiling, talking and even laughing.

I think my favorite part of the day was when we were getting ready to go and she went around the room pointing at all of us saying: Papa, Mama, Hermana, Hermana, Hermano, Hermano. Then she gave us all big hugs one at a time. So great!

Can you believe it?!

Wowzers! Smiles all around!

She wanted water from the big 2L like everyone else. (Yes, we are already sharing germs. ha!) So I helped her and it spilled down her front. I expected a cry. Instead I got to hear her laugh for the first time. It became a game. I think she drank a whole liter of water. The whole front of her jacket was soaked! Then there was the cap game... everyone was laughing. It was great!

We took about a hundred pics today plus a couple short videos. It is nigh unto midnight so I am going to upload just a few more shots from our time together and call it a day.

We were still warming up to each other here.

Firsts today:

• Hearing her say to me, “Te quiero, mamá.” (I love you, mama.)
• Hearing her laugh.
• Seeing all the siblings having fun together.

No Washington wall is safe from the mural musings of this color lover. The kids had a 4 day weekend that is too quickly coming to a close. I decided this would be a perfect time to do a project promised a long time ago. We painted the girls room! Now we are almost all ready for our bundle of blessing to find her place in our home. What’s left? Setting up the bunk bed and getting some bedding and clothes. There is probably some other stuff, but that will all work itself out in good time.

Enjoy the photo log of our painting project!

(Click them to see them in a bigger size.)

The kids have a four day weekend due to parent teacher conferences. I am inspired to paint the girls room. We are going with huge sunflowers in a neon pastel color scheme. Raimy has a cute little stencil that we will use for the chair rail height border. We are going to paint the girls’ names in the the middle parts of three of the hugest sunflowers. It is going to be so cute! I can hardly wait to start spreading the wonder on the walls.

I have chosen six main colors. This morning I nabbed a bunch of images and made some swatches so that we have a mixing guide. Following is the explosion of pretty to tempt your taste buds and tantelize your eyes.

Saturday morning my kids donned their gym shorts and school shirts. Accessorized in team colors and cool water bottles in hand we were out the door for Field Day. After an Olympics style entrance of each class with flags and fanfare they lit the torch. The Bolivian anthem was sung and the student athlete code recited. Shaded under the newly finished covered sports area the kids’ competitions began.

Timothy and Raimy were pitted against one another in a game of “Street Baseball”. The size of the concrete field doesn’t allow for a full on baseball game. So this modified version makes use of a ball made of socks, four corners marked with cones for bases, and the use of the palm to hit the ball after the pitch. Timothy’s fifth grade team gave Raimy’s sixth grade team a run for their money. The final score was 9 to 7, all blacks sixth graders taking the victory.

Gabrielle played dodge ball. At the school I attended when I was a kid dodge ball consisted of all the littler kids lining up against the brick wall outside while a bigger kid pegged us off one by one. The dodge ball games played this weekend were much more involved. There were teams and rules. You continued playing even after you were hit by trying to catch the ball from the end of the court and throw it at an opponent. I enjoyed watching them.

The final game of the day (which happened to be a dodge ball game) was a real thriller. It was a free for all, mixed grades, mixed teams competition. Everyone was kinda tired so lots of kids were out fairly quickly. Then the ref announced that Gabriela (my Gabrielle) was the last one standing for her team. The game lasted for another long five minutes as there were about 10 kids all trying to get out my girl. She was great at dodging and ducking and jumping around. She had a blast but finally was bopped on the top of her head. What a good sport she was as she laid down on her back in the middle of the court and laughed while saying, “That was great!”

The thumbnail images can be clicked to see a full sized picture

In human communication we quantify and qualify nouns. Our adjectives and inflection give away our opinions. The slightest hint of sarcasm or condescension can skew the literal meaning of a phrase to make it mean the absolute opposite. A scowl, furrowed brows, crossed arms and gritted teeth seethe out, “I don’t care,” and we know instantly that the person cares very much about whatever travesty has landed them in this moment of defiance. Two girls walking down the street with elbows interlocked share a secret of the silly sort, a giggle, a sparkle in the eyes, and the one tells the other, “I don’t believe a word of it,” and we all know the bond of trust between the couple has been strengthened in this moment of true truth. Somehow we know how to read the signals and listen past the dictionary definitions of the words.

At times I read aloud. Yes, to my children or when I am addressing a crowd. Also, though, to myself. Some books just beg to be heard. Some technical articles are solved when I slow down and hear each step. The rough waters of Spanish bodies of words are set calm again when I take the time to pronounce each word and understand the meaning. When I practice this out loud lecture certain combinations that I would normally run right past stand still and grab my attention as if I had never heard them before.

A pair of words seen together frequently gave me pause today: good mother. You have heard that, right? So how is it that we, as a society, have come to qualify this noun ‘mother’? A woman either is a mother or she is not a mother. It is a definition in itself; why must we define the definition? We turn the noun to a verb and we say that a lady mothered or is mothering a being. Funny that we never say motherer. The female parent is a mother. We don’t ever say, “She is a good female.” Either a person is female or not. Yet, we feel inclined to describe the description.

It comes back to the way in which a woman performs her duties as a mother. A woman who neglects her children is said to be a bad mother. She is still a mother, though. This is a point of contemplation for me because mothering a brood is not easy. The gravity of being entrusted with raising these little people is not something I take lightly. I worry. Too much I worry that I am not a ‘good mother’. Too many times I ask why God would give me all these precious little ones to care for. I fall short, at times I loose my temper, more often that I should be I am lazy, sometimes I just hope no one is watching me when I am impatient with my kids, and the list goes on.

So why am I the one mothering these children? Is it because the mothers who birthed them are bad mothers? Ah, yes, to clarify, I am thinking of the wee ones that found their way to my arms not through the furies of the birth canal but through the horrors of abuse and abandonment. Were their mothers bad? The ones we have now all have at least one parent living. I hate to think of where they came from and what their little eyes have seen. No matter how hard I try I cannot hate their mothers. You will not hear me say that they have bad mothers. Maybe some can find motivation in judging people they don’t know; I simply cannot operate like that.

Am I a replacement mother? Am I an interim mother? Am I a substitute mother? Can I even be called a good mother? For the sake of the children I desire with my whole heart to perform mothering duties well. I want to care for them, provide for them, hug them, raise them and love them the best way I can. As we make the transition to ONE home for all of us I am struck, like a bowling ball in the gut, with the fact that round about a dozen of these kids may one day call me ‘mamá’. It feels like a weighty honor. I want it, but I am also so reverentially fearful of all the implications that follow.

Whether they be persons born from my womb, adopted, brought into our home, or just with me for a short while I truly do want to be a good mother for them. This is my prayer.

God, You are our Father. I trust You. I love You. This task of mothering so many is daunting at times. I do not want to fail You; for I know that these little ones, as a heritage, have been entrusted to me. I do not want to fail the children who are a precious treasure in Your eyes and mine. Please help me to mother well, God. Please help me to see them as You see them, speak to them as You would speak to them, and love them as only You can enable me to. Bless my children, Father. Hold their hearts in Yours. Help us, please. Amen.